Monday, May 7, 2012


5 days before I leave for LA.

Seriously freaking out.

Mom managed to get me a window seat, which i prefer because then I can crowd the body of the airplane.

My mom is freaking out a little bit too, which doesn't help me at all, since she's usually cool as a cucumber about being a larger woman.

I'm terrified I am going to get kicked off. It's a booked plane, there is no option to buy two seats or a first class seat (even if we COULD afford it, which we can't)

All it takes is one person to complain.

I don't know what I'll do, other than cry like a baby. Other dark things come into my head, but we're not going there.

I'm making myself positively sick over this.

I just don't know if I am smaller, larger, or the same as I was 3 years ago for my fiance's brother's wedding. I didn't weigh myself back then.

I hope smaller. I just couldn't stand the embarrassment.

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